Canoodle Troubles
by Indilwenlily
Summary: Robin is sick and trying to sleep, but Wally wants Artemis to canoodle with him. Their fighting isn't helping, but what will Superboy do to help?  Done for my dA canoodle fic challenge


**Warning: Crack will ensue… most likely… I am currently raising my sugar levels to help with the crackness of it, so please bear with me if it ends up a current stream of random letters ends up in the middle of this… if so, it means that I have fallen into a sugar coma, or simply smashed the keyboard while working on vocal warm-ups… also, please do not eat a sandwich while reading. It will most likely be a bomb…**

Disclaimer: I do not own anything… not even Robin… and yes, Canoodle is a word! I HAVE DONE IT!

Canoodle Troubles

"Baywatch, what are you doing?"

"It's called canoodling!"

I groaned as the shouts reached my ear, the sound waves somehow making their way through my tightly sealed door. My head was killing me and my stomach felt like it was about to jump out of my body. I shoved my pillow over my head, but it didn't help much.

"Wally, Artemis, please, Robin is trying to sleep!"

I smirked slightly. Leave it to Kaldur to try and make peace for the good of everyone.

"Kaldur, you've got to try this!" I heard Wally say, and could almost see him jumping from his spot next to Artemis and over to Kaldur, who had been sitting in an armchair last I saw.

I had no idea what this "canoodling" thing was, but Wally seemed extremely interested by it, so I couldn't wait to see. Its weird how best friends are amused by just about the same thing, only having few differences. Mine and Wally's? The fact that Wally enjoys the most unnatural things on pizza.

The sound finally started to die down until Wally screamed something again.

"Helloooooooo beautiful!" his voice rang out painfully loud.

"Hey Wally!" I heard M'gann say.

"Quit flirting, Kid Mouth," Artemis snapped. "She's clearly in a relationship with Superboy and isn't changing her mind anytime soon."

"Well there's no harm in flirting still," I heard his comeback.

"Uh, yes, there is," Artemis yet again raising her voice. "Like the fact that the last time you did your "Impress Megan at all costs" thing, we almost fell into a pit of lava!"

I groaned as I heard a knock at the door, drowning out Kaldur's pleas for Wally and Artemis to stop talking so loud.

"Come in…" I said, sliding my shades over my eyes and looking to the door.

"You feeling ok?" Superboy asked, standing in the doorway.

"Peachy," I said sarcastically. "Could you do me a favor and toss Wally and Artemis onto different sides of the equator?"

I saw the clone smirk, "Flash and Green Arrow would kill me," he said, sounding disappointed. "But I'll try and get them to shut up."

"Thanks Supes," I said, letting my head drop back onto the mattress as he groaned in response before shutting the door.

I felt myself starting to finally fall asleep when yet another yell erupted through the halls.

"SHUT UP OR I'LL KILL YOU!" Superboy, of course.

"What's gotten up your butt?" I heard Wally shout back.

"Do you not understand that Robin has been trying to sleep?" Conner screamed back.

"You're the one yelling!" Wally yelled.

"Because you won't shut up!"

I groaned again and dropped my shades back onto the nightstand, letting my hand hang off of the bed. After a minute, I finally noticed something; the yelling had stopped. Conner had gotten them to shut up.

My eyes started drooping shut and I was excited to finally get some sleep. It had been a long past couple of nights in Gotham, throw in handfuls of bruises, a whack to the head and a stomach bug, and you've got a really bad day.

I welcomed the sleep, but almost cried when it was scared away by yet another shriek.

"WILL YOU STOP IT WITH THIS CANOODLING THING?" It had to be Artemis.

"I will when you stop being so annoying!"

"I'm not the annoying one!"

"But do you deny having cooties?"

"Coo-WHAT?"

"Yeah, I said it!"

"I do not have cooties!"

"You sure?"

"Positive!"

"You mean you tested positive for them?"

"I'm positive I do not have them!"

"Let me give you your shot!"

Artemis actually screamed this time. I never thought she had it in her, but it wasn't a scream of fear. More like a scream you make when you really want to kill someone, so you do it into a pillow to stop people from hearing your frustration. This wasn't into a pillow, and it was followed by a crash and a "What'd you do that for, Arty?"

I finally picked up my pillow and screamed into it. It was getting to be too much, and they wouldn't be stopping any time soon.

I stopped when I heard footsteps running down the hall and the door was flung open.

"What's wrong?"

I peeked out of the corner of the pillow and saw Conner, one hand on the door and another on the frame.

"Nothing," I said. "Besides the fact that those two morons won't SHUT UP!"

"But I heard you scream."

"Oh, that," I said. "Well, when people get really mad, they sometimes scream into a pillow. Like, Artemis should have just done, but she decided not to, knocking Wally off balance from the shock and yet again preventing me from getting rest and recovering from this freaking concussion and stomach virus!"

Conner stood there, looking at me like I was insane, before nodding his head slightly. "I think I know what to do. Go to sleep."

"Thank you," I heaved and waiting until the door was closed to remove the pillow from in front of my face.

"You want to what?" Artemis asked, not bothering to keep her voice down.

"It will keep you two from arguing," I heard Conner say.

"But it's what we've been arguing over!"

"Which is why we'll all do it."

"Artemis, this screaming is not helping Robin right now," that was Kaldur, again trying to be the peace maker in the subtle way of his.

I heard Artemis groan loudly. Not to self; have Batman soundproof the cave for situations like this.

"Fine, I'll do it," the blonde finally said. "But I'm doing it for Robin. Not for any other reason. This is seriously just creepy."

"Yeah, but totally awesome!" Wally exclaimed.

I heard M'gann giggling and couldn't help but wonder what they were doing. I didn't get t find out, though, as sleep came back, finally convinced that there was nothing to be afraid of anymore.

I woke up a few hours later and stretched my arms above my head, yawning. My stomach felt slightly better and my head wasn't hurting as much. I got up and put my shades on, not caring that I was still in my black and red pajamas. I walked into the hall and it was still amazingly quiet.

I went into the main room and what I saw seriously disturbed me. It really wasn't a turbing sight. Wally, Artemis, Superboy, M'gann and Kaldur were all standing in a circle… petting each other. They were just moving their hands down each others arms.

"Robin!" Wally cried, breaking free of the circle. "Duuude, where've ya been? I was starting to wonder when you'd get here!"

I saw Superboy, M'gann and Kaldur all look at him like he was the stupidest kid in the world. Which, actually, he kind of was. He was book smart, I'll give him that, but he wasn't brain smart.

"What are you all doing?" I asked.

"Dude, it's this thing called canoodling! This kid Josh posted it on his facebook, so I went and looked it up. This right here—what we were just doing—is called a canoodling circle. You totally missed the best canoodling ever!"

I suddenly felt sick, like my stomach was once again trying to jump out of my body. And it really tried it's hardest this time, so I ran to the bathroom without saying anything, skidding to a halt and finally giving my poor stomach what it so desperately wanted.

I heard Wally come in behind me, shutting the door and pulling my shades off for me. He knew my secret, so it wasn't a big deal.

"Let it out, dude," he kept saying, so I did. It tasted disgusting, which was why I always hated being sick, but I at least felt better afterwards.

It also turned out that I didn't miss out on the canoodling, because as I kneeled there, I felt Wally's hand on my back… canoodling me.

…The end…

**A/N: Well… wasn't as entertaining as I thought it would be… oh well! This is my canoodle story for my weekly YJ word challenge, where I will be posting a new word every Friday night or Saturday afternoon. You have a week to write a oneshot using that word, or with that word playing a part, like how the canoodling was a huge thing in this. I will be participating in this challenge, just because I want to broaden my horizons of writing. I mostly do angst and adventure like stuff, so I want to start working on crack and other things. Let me know what you think, and check my DeviantArt account, IndilwenLily every Friday night at around 11ish. If it's not there yet, along with my reviewish thing of that nights episode, than check Saturday afternoon. Just so you know, next week there may not be a review thing… it all depends, but I will post a word ^^**


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